Cartoons

**u1arunit** · 03-05-2007, 12:36 PM

THE TOP 10 CARTOON CHARACTERS MOST LIKELY TO USE DRUGS

10. Gargamel
Most likely LSD. He spends his life in pursuit of little blue guys in white outfits and mentally abusing his cat. What does he plan to do with the blue dwarfs once he catches them anyway?
9. Olive Oyl
Probably Dexatrim Abuse, maybe some amphetamines. Who's that skinny?! She might even be anorexic; she is always giving her burger to her friend.
8. Snagglepuss
Can't explain it. Maybe it's the name or the look, but he's suspicious.
7. He-man
This is the easy one. I mean c'mon. Roid monkey No. 1. "BY THE POWER OF ANABOL!!!" Makes me want to root for Skelator. Alone on his castle, hitting the weights. And on top of that, he even injects the stuff in his pet tiger -- animal abuse.
6. & 5. Yogi and Boo-Boo
We all know what is really in those picnic baskets. They go back to their cave and trip.
4. Droopy
The number one downer in toon land. Can't someone slip him an upper once in a while? the only time I saw him happy was when he saw the picture of the babe.
3. Dopey Dwarf
He openly admits it. The other dwarfs deny involvement, but they are under investigation. Allegations is that Doc is writing some extra scripts for Sneezy and all the guys partaking are afloat.
2. Daffy Duck
If he isn't using crack, Marion Barry is clean. He is so wired, he bounces around on his head without pain. Blows his beak off all the time. Some symptoms might be from "daffiness," but Haldol wouldn't work for him. It might be for his buddy with Tourettes, Porky.
1. Shaggy
By far the No. 1 suspect. His clothes, his hair, his bad goatee and the boy converses with dogs. All of this is nothing until you consider the munchie factor. Anybody who consumes 9.3 dog treats per episode smokes weed.

All About Scooby-Doo.

What we remember:
Four teenagers and their trusted dog gallop across the country in their purple and green van solving mysteries of all sort--and in the process meet all kinds of interesting people.

The Truth:

Four high-school dropouts and their sentient dog ride around the country in their psychedelic love machine, earning their way by selling drugs. Oh, and they occasionally take some old guy's mask off to solve a mystery,.. but even then, it starts to become apparent that those kids always seem to 'find' trouble.

It may be a little hard to swallow, but just take a look at the evidence:
Take Shaggy for example. Not only is he the inspiration for the current 'grunge' scene, with his sloppy dress and facial hair, but Shaggy is obviously a 'burner', i.e., he smokes marijuana. Why do you think he is constantly hungry? Shaggy can make a six foot hoagie and swallow it whole.

And then there is Scooby himself. While dogs do not generally smoke joints, Scooby gets his 'high' from Scooby-Snacks, which are in fact Hash-Brownies. Whenever Scooby, or Shaggy for that matter, eats a Scooby-Snack, they go ape! It just blows their mind and they do whatever they are told, because they are so lit! Scooby is also hungry all the time.

The other characters do not actively take part in the stoner-fest that Shaggy and Scooby do, but they do condone the selling of it because it helps support their jaunts across the country (and the world--they drove to China once). These other characters do have their own peculiarities however...

Fred and Daphne are always splintering off from the group to go 'solve the case' by themselves. It's no real mystery what these two are really doing--they're getting busy in the back of the Mystery Machine.
Daphne with her pretty pink, well, legs and Fred are constantly bumping uglies. Fred is, by the way, pumped up on steroids. One thing that remains a mystery to me though, is why he always wore that stupid scarf around his neck.

And what about Velma? Everyone's least favorite of the cast, was of course, a lesbian. But, as it turned out in the later episodes, she was also into bestiality. Where do you think Scrappy-Doo came from? Scrappy, who was a dog yet spoke perfect English, was obviously a product of Velma and Scooby.

So the kids spent their teenage years driving around the world, slingin' dope, shooting steroids, eating hash brownies, and screwin' their dog, while all the while looking for the perfect 'hit'.
Bet you’ll never look at these cartoons the same again! lol