Some laughs.


'My sister and I were at teh mall and passed by a store that sold a variey of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "no, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet red and walked away.'



'Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three year old son had a l a ot of problems potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven month old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said 'no.' I kept thinking, 'oh, Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me.' Then I said, 'Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?' 'No,' he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooo, I asked hime one more time, 'Danny, did you have an accident?' This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, and bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled. SEE MOM ITS JUST FARTS!!!!. While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down.'


A true story. We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: 'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too!

While on a flight from NY, the stewardess was busy passing out peanuts and cokes to everyone. There were about sixteen flights lined up waiting to get clearance to take off. Then then other stewardess got a message from the pilot htat the tower said they were first to take off and to have everyone buckle up. Without thining she just announced 'Please buckle up, grab your drinks and hold your nuts, we're taking off!' No one saw her for the rest of the flight.